Day 47: Hard Days

I feel like I cannot stress enough how hard it is to be a parent. There are seriously days when your kids refuse to listen to you and behave like manics and you are just looking around thinking, “I should not be a parent, I can’t even control a two year old”. All parents have these dark moments and it doesn’t make you a bad parent it makes you human. Today my neighbor came over and she has 8 insanely well behaved children. My son was jumping on the couch hitting at me when I told him to stop and being a total jerk. I will say it because it is true in that moment he was being a total dick like only toddlers can be. I was at my breaking point from then on until bedtime when he looked at me and told me I am his best friend and he loves me, and then he kissed me on the forehead. And that my friends is what having children is really like. They can be nightmares all day and then do something so incredibly sweet that you forgive them for anything and your heart literally swells with love and you cannot help but smile.

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Day 46: body image 

Today I tried to teach my son a valuable lesson about ideal body images. We were watching Justice League cartoons and one of the villains is a female cheetah with huge boobs. He looks at me and asks, “Mom why does that Tiger have boobs?”.  So I answered in a slightly annoyed tone (not with him but with society for the way they portray woman and muscular men for that matter…) that she had boobs, “because even in cartoons women are sexulaized and that’s why it’s important to be a feminist”. 

He looked at me slightly perplexed and said, “does she nurse her baby with her boobs?”. I replied immensely proud, “yes, yes she does”. Moments like this make me realize there is still hope in the world and my kids will change it for the better. He’s going to be okay. 

Here is the villain super appropriate: 

Day 45: Be Calmed. 

Okay. His morning at breakfast I was telling my son to hurry up, because he was literally eating half bites of cereal, and we needed to leave. He looked at me and said, “Mom, why are you freaking out? Be calmed”. Seriously. That little future yogi told me that. 

As a parent it is impossible to be cool and collected all the time. Some days we yell and have to be reminded by an almost three year old to stop freaking out. His perspective amazes me. Other days I am pretty sure he’s testing me. 

Day 43: young moms. 

Okay. This is a real rant. I’m 27 going on 28. I’ve been married for 5 years have a college degree, own my own home and I’m considered a young mom and I’m treated like it by other moms and society. 

I just don’t understand. I was 25 when my son was born. My mom was 22 when she had her first child. My mother in law was 18 when my husband was born. I am not young. It is crazy that it is totally acceptable to have a child in your 40’s but looked down upon to have one in your 20’s. Seriously. Society tells me that I’m missing out on life and establishing a career because I had children at 25! At play dates and gatherings the other mom’s will reminiscing about the 80’s look at me and say oh your probably too young to know what we are talking about. That shit happens. Seriously. 

Moral of the story. Being a certain age doesn’t make you a good parent. We are all doing our best. Don’t be a fucking ass hole and try to put any parents down for any reason… including their age. 

Day 42: movies

Here I am at 12:30 am wide awake. I had the headache from hell all day. Passed out shortly after the kids fell asleep (8:30 and it was glorious) and have been up three times. Once to soothe my toddler, once to feed the baby, and the third time to take my toddler to the bathroom. You try falling asleep after that… 

My son didn’t watch tv or see a screen until he was well over 1. My poor daughter has been subjected to the movie minion and all the Paw Patrol episodes since she was days old. I didn’t want my children to watch a ton of tv and then I had two of them. This post isn’t about screen time but movie content. My son has recently started watching “real movies”, not cartoons. We tried Harry Potter that was too scary, but avengers age of ultron and captain America civil war? Totally okay. Today (or I guess yesterday) he was inconsolable because we watched Despicable Me and he didn’t understand why the dad (Gru) gives the little girls back to their mom (the lady that runs the orphanage). Seriously. Real people dressed as super heroes fighting other people doesn’t phase him but children crying in a cartoon is too much. 

Once we tried to watch Pocahontas and he was so scared he was shaking when the Native American was shot but he’s totally cool with the minions killing every boss they have… my point here is you never know what will set kids off or what they will like. So alway, ALWAYS pre-watch a movie before your kid sees it. I never realized how violent kids movies actually are (I’m looking at you Disney! Stop killing off moms!!). I cannot wait until Knox has a say in what we watch so they can fight over that instead of cheetos and rice puffs. 

Day 41: snow day madness 

Apparently snow days mean everyone (including the dogs) get to act crazy. My son “helped” me shovel 6 inches of snow off of the driveway this morning while my daughter napped. So he basically ran around in his puff ball snow suit getting trapped in drifts and eating snow for 2 hours. Yes. It took me 2 hours. Luckily he was exhausted after that and napped. When both kids woke up chaos ensued. My son opened a bag of cheetos shared some with his sister while I was in the bathroom. I walked into the living room to cheese finger prints on the couch and carpet and one of the dogs licking the baby’s cheeto and then she would take a turn sucking on it…. 

I’m switching my dogs food and like a good fur parent mixed it with the old food. My dogs have decided to only eat the new food and spit out the old food all over the house. Is it bedtime yet? 

Here is the dog food just in case you thought I was exaggerating. 

Day 40: children are odd 

I think all children are odd. Seriously. They haven’t been taught to be “normal” so they do things exactly how they want to do them. My son went through a phase that if you cut up his food he would cry and say you broke it and he would refuse to eat it. I literally had to hide when I cut his food so he would think it just came that way…. that happened. My daughter doesn’t like when you take food from her she will cry until you give it back even if she hasn’t touched it for minutes. So I wipe her face and while her eyes are covered or she’s distracted I have to take her tray away. The things we do as parents… 

here is a picture of my son sneaking into my daughters room as I was putting her to bed. Notice he’s using a giant bear as cover. My life revolves around anticipating what will set one of them off.

Day 39: caffeine 

There are some days when there isn’t enough caffeine to keep you akwake. Poor Knox was up all night. She’s getting 5 teeth, she’s compacted (parents nice way of saying constipated), and she has diaper rash. I drank 2 huge coffees and 1 giant tea. Mistake. Now we both feel terrible. At least she gets to nap. 😒 I miss napping. 

When your babies don’t feel well you would do anything to make them comfortable like letting them sleep in your arms for hours, or co-sleeping even when you can’t sleep because your convinced you’ll roll onto them and smother them… 

Day 38: Home Depot 

Okay. So the first Saturday of every month Home Depot has kids work shops where they get to build something awesome. It is complete chaos with a lot hammering, paint everywhere, and orange aprons. It is awesome. I highly recommend it because it is free and a blast.